A Friend?

As a friend, I realize I’m not perfect. Saya bukan teman yang selalu berusaha menghubungi teman-teman saya setiap saat. Kalau udah lamaaa banget nggak ketemu atau dengar kabarnya biasanya baru saya SMS. Tapi karena sekarang udah ada Facebook dan biasanya mereka sering mengupdate status jadi saya mengikuti keadaan mereka dari Facebook. Kalau kelihatannya mereka sedih, saya akan menanyakannya melalui comment di Facebook. Mungkin salah saya juga yang bukannya langsung menanyakan melalui telepon atau SMS.

Tapi ketika seorang teman bilang saya cuma teman yang cuma ada kalau saya lagi butuh aja, saya sangat sangat marah. Ketika saya tidak menanyakan keadaan mereka melalui SMS atau telepon, saya mau tanya balik: do you even bother to call me either? Ok, let me recall, not a single SMS or phone call from you. And did I say something bad about your absence of not asking me? NOT AT ALL! I know you’re a super busy person and have no time to call me at all. Fine. No problem. Not mad at all. But if you keep saying I’m just a friend who’s only there in happy times, you’re WRONG, baby. I can be there for you, but will you be there for me? Will you stop your judgments on me? Cuz it really bothers me now. And it hurts like hell when you say that. Do you even care when you hurt me like this? Do you even think that you make me sad?

We were good, we were best friends. And I miss the old times when we could laugh out loud at the same points, we could talk all night long, and we could share a lot of things together. I miss those moments. I miss our friendship. If only you know how hard it was to erase all the pain you’ve caused me. And when I did, you did the same thing again. And I’m standing here asking you: are we really friends now? Cuz friend will not hurt the other over and over again.

I do care about you. Not depend on how many SMS and phonecalls I make. You are more than just those gadgets. But now you hurt me again. Like any other scars you’ve made.

Are you still my friend anyway?


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